“What do you want to be when you grow up, little guy?” I asked my friend’s son.
“I want to be an astronaut! Or, or a baseball player. Or a scientist!!!” My friend’s son replied. I loved his eagerness, and his wealth of options!
“And what do you want to be when you grow up, dude?” I asked my adult friend. He looked at me somewhat nihilistically, no eagerness at all in his eyes.
“Uhhh…I don’t know, man,” he stammered. I could only imagine the different options going through my 30-something year old friend’s mind: “Alive!” or “Debt-free!” or “Retired!” or “At home with a pizza and a show to binge-watch!”
Why didn’t my friend have anything to share, just because he’s an adult? Worse yet, why do I feel the same way most days? I’m all grown up already, right?
As a kid, I never had a straight answer for the question of what I wanted to be when I grew up. To this day, I’m still not quite sure of my answer! One thing I am sure of is that even after crossing the big “18” and “21” age boundaries and then some, the growing up process never has stopped.
In my opinion, we’re all still growing up. It’s not often that we adults consider the growth we experience year to year as part of the “growing up” process, but it certainly must be. It’s just not only in regard to age anymore.
When you stand up to a colleague at work who is harassing his office mates, you’re growing up. When you make that mortgage payment on time after months of difficulty keeping steady, you’re growing up. When you choose to stop drinking or using other substances, you’re growing up. When you reach out to a therapist for the first time, you’re growing up. When you finally forgive that family member who offended you years ago, you’re growing up.
The most significant difference I’ve observed between adults as they grow up and kids as they grow up is the attitude of approach. Most kids are so eager to grow and to learn! Most adults, on the other hand, are not so eager. Typically, we experience a reluctance to change how things are. Some of us even experience foreboding dread about lessons that need to be learned and accepted. Growth hurts sometimes!
Whether you’re still a kid at heart, or you’re a hardened cynic, I encourage you to take a look at your life right now and identify 3 areas of potential growth opportunity. Then write those areas of potential growth down as goals for yourself, be it job-related, family-related, relationship-related – you name it! Sometimes, writing a goal for your own growth actually gives you something to look forward to and work towards – it may even reignite that kid-like eagerness from days past.
