Men don’t always talk about what’s going on inside—and often, we don’t even realize we’re struggling until something breaks. Mental health symptoms don’t always show up as feelings of sadness, worry, or loneliness for all of us. Instead, emotional distress for men often manifests through different unspoken signs than the obvious ones. Sometimes they look like cussing out the car going too slowly in front of us, working overtime for several weeks without rest, or finishing off a six-pack just to “take the edge off” more regularly than normal.
Research backs this up. A 2015 study published in JAMA Psychiatry found that men often express depression through irritability, aggression, or risky behaviors like substance use or reckless driving, rather than more traditionally recognized symptoms like unhappiness or social withdrawal. These behaviors are often misinterpreted as mere stress or negative personality traits, rather than signs of underlying mental health concerns.
A significant factor contributing to this issue is the prevalent undercurrent of societal expectation for men to remain stoic and self-reliant. This pressure can lead to alexithymia—a condition characterized by difficulty in identifying and expressing one’s own emotions. As a result, many men may not even realize they’re experiencing depression or anxiety, making it less likely they will seek help.
This can take a toll not just on ourselves, but on the people we care about. Irritability and aggression can quickly turn into domestic violence. Substance use or reckless driving can quickly turn into chemical dependence or driving under the influence. Instead of shrugging off or stuffing down these unique manifestations, we need to see them for what they are: warning signals.
If you have noticed yourself snapping at family or coworkers more often, pulling away from friends or loved ones, drinking more than usual, or just feeling off, this could be your brain telling you that you’re not okay and need some support. Being honest and curious with ourselves and our bodies, and furthermore reaching out for help are not signs of weakness, but rather are good steps toward resilience and well-being.
You don’t have to do life alone. Showing up for ourselves and for each other is where true strength is found. Call The Willow Center today to get connected.
Written by Chase Cotten, Community Director
Reviewed by Ashley English, LAC
